Loving Lucius (Werescape) Page 11

  Violet pulled a comb through the ends of a section of my hair as I sat in a chair at the table. "Where does Sherry go all day?"

  You can't tell a child the truth. She probably knows about sex though. But I don't want to discuss the subject now. "With the women. She helps around the outpost."

  "Sherry? She hates work. That doesn't make sense."

  Leave it to the ten year old to point out the obvious. I smiled at her straight-lipped frown in the mirror Lucius left. Lucius. Why did I think about him? I'd just think about Sherry. "Don't worry. Sherry is safe. Tacitus takes her everywhere."

  Violet pressed the teeth of the comb into the top of my scalp and dragged the prongs through my hair again, smiling as she stared where her hands moved. "I like him. He tells me jokes."

  When? I studied her smile. "I haven't heard any of these jokes."

  "It's when he and Sherry bump into me during the day. He's funny."

  What are those two doing all day? "You should tell Tacitus to make Sherry help out and do some work then."

  "He always tells me she's very busy doing her share. Pulling her weight. That's when Sherry grins at him. I don't understand it, Elise. Sherry hates work."

  Why did my little sister have to be so smart at ten? Joy. We'll never hide the alien DNA we carry. But Sherry was definitely doing her share of work under Tacitus' helpful supervision. "I don't know. I'll ask next time I see one of them."

  "I'm glad we came here," Violet said out of the blue.

  My heart sank.

  I can't begrudge her happiness. But why did she have to say that one thing? We needed to leave. Find a place to live before Sherry gave birth to the harrowing truth of our lineage.

  Her hands stilled in my hair. "You don't like it here?"

  Looking at her meant she could see my expression reflected in the mirror. I gently placed the mirror on the table. "I do. It's just--"

  "Lucius is scary?"

  He had started acting wild and uncontrollable. But if I could be honest, if I could just confess, there'd be no reason for anyone to act crazy. "It's just me." I turned and pulled her wrist to where she stood before me. "Lucius and Marcus are fighting over which one of them gets me."

  Her eyes grew round and twinkled with firelight. "Oh, that's what's wrong! Elise, pick Lucius. I feel sorry for him. And he's the cute one."

  No. He'd hound me to the end. Insist I confess. And if he can't control himself now, what about when he learns what I am? "Listen." I gave her wrist a tug to reiterate the importance of my point. "Not one word about that. To anyone. Anywhere. Do you hear me? It's bad enough you talk about aliens. But making everyone here uncomfortable about Lucius and Marcus will only cause us lots of trouble."

  "I don't want any trouble. I like the other kids." She blinked thoughtfully.

  Well, I'd use that against her. "Then, say nothing of this. Ever. Or we'll have to leave. I doubt we'll be as lucky as we were to find so many children you like here somewhere else."

  Violet blinked again and nodded. "I understand."

  If so, that would be a miracle. I could really use a miracle right now.

  ****

  The next morning didn't deliver a miracle or Sherry. My sister is gone now. Mated. Must be. Or Tacitus lost control and ripped her annoying head off. I doubt I could be that lucky with the shortage of women of child-bearing age on Earth. And Violet left bright and early, giddy as heck. I'd lost the battle. I'd have to find a way to survive here. A way to blend in. A little coffee would help. I used an old shirt to grab the pot's handle from where it sat next to the embers in the fireplace, right inside the hearth, and poured a cup of dark liquid.

  Steam billowed upward to warm my cheek with a kiss.

  Marcus had provided sugar after spotting the pot and coffee. So, I choked down a lump of guilt and used the gift from him. It's not like he'd know. Or that I'd have to reciprocate the gift with a visit where I had to look him in the eye and smile. Pretend I favored him.

  Or I need to accept Marcus for what he is. An acceptable mate who could protect me in a Shifter community. Maybe time would make that easier. Maybe, just maybe, I could crawl into his bed one day and let him touch my skin.

  My gut twisted.

  Against me. The traitor. But Marcus isn't Lucius. Touchable. I placed the pot back on the hearth and stirred my coffee.

  A knock rapped.

  Not Marcus this early. He had to know I wouldn't bathe two days in a row. Outpost rules forbade that waste of water.

  Men out to please women. He probably wanted to convince me I could do whatever I wanted. Just to please me. I placed the cup on the table, tossed my long braid over my shoulder on the way to the door, and quickly counted the buttons working to ensure my heavy shirt concealed as much of my skin as possible.

  Nobody waited outside. But a backpack leaned against the side of the wooden step. Marcus would have been there, grinning, claiming the glory for a gift. The pack had to be from Lucius.

  But he'd left it.

  Again. More gifts. Bribes. Why so many things to win a moment to speak with me? To lure me into a confession. The man truly protected his relations and intended on sniffing out my secret. Forcing my admission. How will I avoid the inevitable? But this torture didn't discount I had a bag of loot at my feet. Whatever he brought this time could make my life easier until I had to escape.

  That's it. I'll leave as soon as Violet is as comfortable as Sherry.

  What hid inside the leather? I stared at the bulging bag.

  Wishing I had vision that could analyze the contents like Wolf vision could see at night. Would it be wrong to take another offering? And would I hate myself tomorrow for passing up a pile of treasure that can improve life in The Wild? My life could use a little improving. Of course, he owed me anyway. As Father's men would say, what the hell. I peeked left then right.

  Just well-worn path and log masonry. I pulled the door wide and stepped into warm sunlight.

  Two steps took me to the edge of the long plank step and the backpack. The cold stiff leather hadn't been touched much if at all in ages. Probably one left when the aliens harvested most of the human population. Especially by the tiny equidistant machine-laid stitches. But the leather hadn't turned brittle through the years. I slipped an arm through a stiff strap and rose, turning.

  To a tall form.

  I jumped out of my skin.

  Lucius. So tall. Wearing only blue jeans. His broad tanned chest bare now. Muscles bulging in every direction. There stood a person who could overpower me. In a heartbeat. I clutched the backpack to my chest and gaped at the sight of him.

  Perfection. Too perfect in how he could alienate me. Funny word--alienate. I needed to lock my damn door and leave him outside. Would he stop me? I studied his brown hiking boots.

  Did I dare make a dash for the door? I'd have to turn, slam it shut, grab the two-by-four beside the doorframe, and drop it in place. How could I manage all that? He's huge. Fast. I'd watched him move back on the trail with a fluidity that stole my breath away. And if he shifts…

  "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you." His words were low, carefully spoken. " I just wanted to knock again in case you didn't hear me the first time."

  Did he speak that way to warn me? Or to keep from alerting Augustus's acute hearing? I had to bar myself behind the door.

  God. Why had I come outside? I'm stupid. This is what I deserve.

  "Please, Elise, look at me," he gently begged.

  Why? So he can gloat when he sees the fear in my eyes?

  "Listen to my voice. Augustus says it's the tone that shows people your intent. I'm not angry. I'm not here to scare you. I just need to talk. For a few minutes. Inside. We can't be out here if Marcus comes along. My Wolf is pissed at him. That would be bad. Very bad."

  What about how he's pissed at me? But if I talked to him, he'd be finished with me. And Augustus said he'd sent him to speak with me. Okay. Would Lucius go away afterward? Please go away then. "If I do," I rolled my
gaze up his long stretch of thick denim-cloaked legs, to where his tanned skin etched out each rib, over the bulging muscle of his breast, to his pleading blue gaze.

  Tilted down a bit. Just enough to show he tried to peer into my eyes because I wouldn't look directly at him.

  Maybe he isn't here to harass me. Maybe. Not. "If I do, will you leave me alone then?"

  He shrugged. "Maybe I'll keep bringing you gifts. Things to make me feel better because of my heartless actions."

  Well, at least he seemed honest. The liar. Once inside, I might be able to slam the door shut and lock it. What a plan. I stepped into the shade of my lodge.

  But the bloody door hung wide open. So open I couldn't reach the edge without moving fast. Looking obvious. Could I manage to slam the door in his face?

  The floor's planking creaked behind me.

  Too late. No chance to jump for the door. I stepped toward the fireplace's stone surround.

  What would he do?

  Would it matter if I screamed for help? Could anyone hear me?

  Where's Marcus when I need him? I found myself staring at the wooden planking.

  "Let's sit," he said behind me.

  I jumped again.

  "Elise, please, I won't hurt you. Believe me."

  The stupid backpack didn't help at all the way I hugged the useless thing. How could I have opened the door for it? For useless things?

  "Come on."

  The floor creaked again.

  One footstep. He'd taken only one. Fine. I'd sit. I'd live or die. And dying sounded pretty damned good with the clock counting down my nine-month wait for Sherry to share our secret with what remained of humanity. I quickly grabbed a chair, yanked it out from the table, and sat.

  The floor creaked. And creaked.

  His legs came to stand before me, bent, and he descended to present that unnerving gaze of his.

  Like I'd want to look into it. I'd already seen him for what he was. Crazed. I stared at the dark leather.

  I'm such a fool. Why had I gone outside? I knew better. And that pack…I swung the bulk from my lap until it disappeared under the table.

  Now, I can stare at my bare hands. Skin. Not a good thing to see with him so close. His sire had touched one already. I had to keep them away from Lucius. Just in case my body decided he needed healing. Bodies had a damning mind of their own. Wouldn't that be the funny end to this madness? Killed by my subconscious.

  "Look at me, please," he whispered. "You can't read a person if you don't look at him."

  Just like Augustus said. But if I look at him, he'll stay longer.

  "Okay, think about this. I'm kneeling. Lower than you. To wolves, I'm in the submissive position. You're the one in the power position. You shouldn't be afraid to look at me. You're in control."

  If only that was true.

  "Please, I just need to clear the air between us. I need you to look at me."

  Okay. If it'll hurry things along. I met his blue gaze, a little.

  "Alright. That's a start." He grinned.

  The most amazing grin I'd ever seen that shook the room. That shook every cell trapping my soul inside my body. He's so gorgeous with that neatly trimmed wisp of a beard and moustache encircling his mouth.

  "I'm sorry for everything, Elise. I can't explain it any other way than my Wolf interfered."

  What does that mean?

  He leaned a bit closer.

  Pressing the air tightly around me. And I couldn't lean back because the chair's wood held me at his mercy.

  "My sire won't have a thing to do with me if I can't close the rift between us."

  But I'm the outsider. "Why?"

  "I lost the game, Elise. I was so caught up in you but tried to do my job. And it went all wrong. So wrong." He winced like the thought shafted him with pain. "I never touched you. Never hurt you. Only asked a few questions. Right?"

  Easy to say when you're over six feet tall and intimidating.

  "Right?" His blond eyebrows arched.

  Almost playfully.

  My knees went limp.

  And something, who knows what, got all hot and hollow feeling between my legs. If he grinned, the rest of me would melt too. Look away. I slid my gaze back to my fingers.

  "No. Don't look away," he whispered. "Please talk to me. Tell me what I can do to make things better between us. To help you not feel intimidated when I'm around."

  Intimidated or smitten? Alone or together, either way those reactions still resulted in panic for me. I can't allow him to discover my truth. And smitten is the last thing he could think of me. Smitten turned into touching. "I don't know." I focused on the faded denim on my knees.

  He grabbed my hands.

  With warm smooth skin and a strong grasp.

  No touching. I jerked my hands away from the comfort of his being.

  He leaned even further over my lap, his gaze searching upward to meet with mine. "That's the second time I touched you. The first by accident that night with the rifle. But this time was no accident. Why did you pull away?"

  Did it matter I if I spill my guts again about being a healer? Not good when that subject led to my DNA.

  "Why can't I touch you? Am I a Shifter? An abomination to you the Normal? Is that it?"

  No! I'm not that heartless or insane. God. I dare not speak though. Or I'd start shaking. Maybe cry. I couldn't afford to look weaker now. I wagged my head.

  "Well, nothing else makes sense. Sherry doesn't have a problem with touching a Shifter."

  No. She doesn't if she's still alive and mated now. Damn her. She'll be my undoing.

  My heart lurched.

  Fanning fear's fire in my chest. Wafting heat up my neck. To my nose and eyes.

  Hell, tears. Why now? Why can't I just be angry? Strong? I turned to the log wall beyond the table.

  "What is it then?" he insisted gently. "You're crying."

  Not yet. I'm not going to cry either.

  Warmth closed around my hand.

  His hand. I jerked mine away.

  "Elise, if you won't look at me, you're going to have to talk to me," he said a tad more sternly.

  Then, he'd have to make me.

  He grabbed my bare hands.

  Tightly. And the tingle sparked like a flame on a tiny candle we'd used on special cakes at New Years' celebrations. I couldn't jerk mine away from his warm solid grasp. I spun to his patient mask. "Let me go."

  "Talk to me. I'll release you."

  The concerned twist to his tanned lips made him so handsome. I could feel my heart warming in the wake of the tingle fanning through my body, my heart spreading, betraying me. The traitorous organ would force me to sit here. Talk to him if I didn't hurry to please him. I have to convince him to leave. "What do you want me to say?"

  "Tell me why you can't stand it when I touch you." His gaze fell to my hands where his thumbs began brushing over my knuckles.

  Curse him and his dogmatic nature. Maybe declaring that one thing would shut him up. "Fine. Father feared everyone would learn about our healing powers just from touching our skin. So he hired Shifters to be our Guardians. And touch became taboo for us. Our Guardians saw to that." Or at least made certain we never forgot. Some of us remained more concerned than others…

  His brow pinched slightly then straightened, but he released my hands.

  Thank goodness. I snatched both to my chest and buried them beneath the shirt's bulky fabric at my armpits.

  "That's why you wear that huge shirt over your clothes." His gaze dropped to the quilted plaid for a moment. "You don't want anyone to touch you."

  Why did he have to look at me like he understood? As if we'd just become friends?

  "Alright. Is that why you despise Shifters?"

  "No." Why won't he go away?

  "You can't stand us because Shifters wouldn't allow you to touch people?"

  Why did he insist this is racism? "No." If only I could run. Hide. Just find a place to stop hearing all the questions. Becau
se something would lead to the aliens. And I'd be in trouble again.

  "You're not making sense, Elise. You tell me one thing but behave differently. There's something about Shifters you dislike."